I'm going to be honest for a second. I have (and I'm not even kidding) 6 drafts ready to publish in my blog! Why haven't I done them? Well because I want to do Harper's birth story first and I need a few pictures off of Marcus's computer. This apparently is too time consuming (it's really not) so I haven't done it! But once I do, it's Harper's birth story followed by all her monthly updates! She will be 6 months next week, I'm not even sure how it happened so quickly! But we love her to pieces and can't imagine wasting a second with her. This brings me to my mommy note of the day.
Let me first tell you what my mommy notes are. They are MINE!! They are something I treasure! I have been writing them down since i was pregnant with Harper. Anytime a mommy did something I loved, I made a note of it. Not going to lie, I also have written down the things I haven't loved. I don't write them in a judge-y way, I just use them to form thoughts of how I might do things or something a little differently. I stick them in my phone and eventually onto my computer. I have them all typed up and just continue to add to them. Mommy notes.
One thing I believe quite firmly, is that each mama does things soooo different! Even from child to child. I could tell someone every single thing I do with Harper, you could try them with your baby and they (or you) could possibly hate each one! I learned this while pregnant. So many mommy's with so much advice!! At one point, my mom told me "stop taking advice, that's my advice!!" Not to say I wasn't soooo grateful for the expertise and words of wisdom coming from so many loving friends and family members, it was just that I was getting so overwhelmed wondering how I could do it ALL!! Example: swaddling. It's supposed to be this thing that babies love, they are supposed to feel all tucked up and secure. I remember watching one of my dearest friend Ashley's baby, Jensen, on Fridays and then living with them for 8 weeks the summer after he was born. To say this boy liked swaddling is an understatement. He LOVED being swaddled and would fall asleep almost instantly. And you couldn't swaddle him too tight, the tighter the better!! Harper however... She HATED it!! I tried different types of blankets, googled a few different ways to do it, nothing. She hated it. At one point, I said to my way too good for me husband, "but Marcus, she is supposed to like it!" He calmly sat me down and lovingly as he does explained to me exactly how ridiculous that sounded!!
Harper wasn't "supposed" to do anything except be a baby.
Harper isn't supposed to be anything, except our baby.
Now I'm rambling, but my point is this; Harper is mine. She is mine and Marcus's, she is on loan to us from a very loving Heavenly Father and by golly I promised Him I would make it about her, I promised Him I would do my very best and love her to pieces! This means that I might do things differently than you, and that's OKAY!
Disclaimer: there are some things (and if you spend time with me you will learn this) that you will know I think are bat crap crazy!! I may question why you do something a certain way, I may look at you like you're crazy (you know the look). Sometimes it's because I'm genuinely curious, other times it's because I think your nuts! But I hope to never and try to never say "well my way is right, here try it like this". I might offer suggestions if you ask and I would hope you would do the same for me as I sit here and flounder, trying to figure this thing called motherhood out!
Gosh! Rambling again. Okay, mommy note: going to sleep! I have had it told to me on several occasions that by such and such age I should be able to put Harper in her bed and have her go to sleep on her own. This is a lovely idea! If you have multiple children or they are close together in age, this is genius and I imagine it makes your life a whole lot easier!! Here's the deal though, Harper doesn't! Those moments, the moments we get when putting her down for a nap or going to bed, they are some of my favorite!!! And Marcus's too! She doesn't have other siblings and won't have any close in age, she sleeps like a dream, it only takes a few minutes... I love it!! I completely understand the philosophy behind it and on several occasions I have asked how people get their babies to do it out of curiosity because it's pretty impressive! But even if I could... I'm not sure I would! And (say it with me now...) that's okay!! I hope this can always be our time. I hope as she gets older she asks me to lay with her and read a book or tell a story, or have HER tell me stories or things she did that day... Things other kids that day, things they talked about... I hope this time is always ours!!
So mommy note today: "enjoy that cuddle time with Harper, you probably won't get that as much with the next baby. Enjoy the snuggles, enjoy her smiles and how she grips your hand or your collar while she falls asleep. It's okay! She doesn't have to go to sleep on her own, not right now. Right now is your time together!"
~A
